World Penguin Day will arrive soon. Here's a salute to our Antarctic trading partners
Reading this will make you smarter, and your newly heightened wit will drive your frenemies crazy and win you increased admiration among your friends. And it has zero calories and is totally organic.
World Penguin Day is coming soon — April 25 — which is great timing because our cold-weather tuxedoed friends have been making headlines lately.
This is all about Trumponomics, of course, the 47th president’s latest attempt to break everyone else’s toys, which is what bad-tempered toddlers do. You know, if you can’t win, make everyone else lose.
And, let’s face it, with his record of bankrupting his own companies, this is a guy who knows how to fail.
So, we’re talking about the Trump tariffs, of course, where he infamously imposed import taxes on some remote and frozen parts of the world inhabited only by — yes, you got it in one! — penguins.
Which launched a glacial ice floe of memes on social media. What follows are a few of my favorites. But before that, and in honor of World Penguin Day, a few actual facts:
A group of penguins in the water is called a raft, but on land it is called a waddle. So, should you encounter them while hiking in Antarctica you would not be redundant to say, “A waddle of penguins just waddled by.”
Why do penguins wear tuxedos? It’s a clever form of camouflage called countershading. From above, the dark coloration of their backs hides them in the dark ocean water, and from below their white bellies blend with the bright sky above.
A penguin is a bird, but unlike other avians its bones are solid, not hollow. The added weight helps them swim underwater.
Why do penguins groom themselves like cats? They spend hours each day spreading oil from a gland near their tail all over their feathers to help waterproof themselves.
Penguin males are similar to humans in how they woo. They give rocks as gifts to potential mates, usually pebbles. The rocks humans give are more expensive. For the record, penguins do not export their pebbles.
Now to the memes:
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J.C. Bruce is a journalist and author of The Strange Files series of mysterious novels (available on Amazon, Barnes & Noble, Kobo, other online booksellers, and at selected libraries). He holds dual citizenship in the United States of America and Florida. His latest novel, Strange Timing, was recently named Book of the Year in the Royal Palm Literary Awards where it also won Gold Medals in the Sci-Fi and Thriller categories. When he’s not writing, he’s in training for the International Underwater Ping-Pong Championships.
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